‘We thank you for and honor your service. We mean it’
By Father Charlie Donahue, CSP
In 1989, a movie came out, Born on the Fourth of July. It starred Tom Cruise and is the biography of a man named Ronald Kovic. He is an injured and paralyzed veteran of the Vietnam War.
Returning home and encountering the Veterans Administration bureaucracy and to people on both sides of the political divide who don’t understand what he went through, Ron Kovic becomes an impassioned critic of the war and advocate for veterans.
The movie is set in the early 1970s in the town of Massapequa, N.Y., my hometown. Many of the memorable characters—his high school wrestling coach and others—are folks that I remembered.
One of the more intense scenes is at Massapequa’s July 4 parade. It was jarring to watch for the first time as I probably marched in that parade as an 8-, 9-, or 10-year-old Boy Scout. It was patriotic, fun, and celebratory for me and my friends. But as the movie recounted, not for everyone.
As we pray with Elijah the prophet, and Zarephath and the poor widow from there in the Gospel, we can pray with all the families and survivor veterans who made it home as well as with the families and friends of those who did not.
Given the warlike state of so many ages and cultures, these widows may have been war or battle widows, now invisible in their patriarchal cultures where the husband and fathers controlled so much. Their need is great, and their faith is greater.
We honor your service. Thank you for your service. Those four or five words are easy to say: We. Honor. Your. Service. Thank. You. For. Your. Service. But the task of actually honoring your service involves so much more than words.
Our gratitude must come at a cost, made tangible in offering our service to the veteran.
I am sure that there was much to enjoy in the services: the work and talent development, the camaraderie and friendships made, and the adventures day in and day out. At the same time, the horror of war leaves scars.
As a police chaplain, I have seen some things that I wish I had not seen, heard what I wish I had not heard. I have been with folks grievously injured, held on to a hand or forehead as best I could, and tried to bless them and their loved ones. I have sat with survivors of others’ cruelty to them with simple water and blankets and listening and time.
Coming off of duty, some folks will ask “how was it?” or “are you OK?” and I won’t tell them what happened or what it was like. I don’t want to ruin their day or reject their kindness, but there are other chaplains and police folks that can process it all together so we won’t become too burnt out or too haunted by what’s happened. And we then carry each other through that.
We thank you for and honor your service. We mean it.
I am willing to bet, too, that even in peacetime service our veterans and others have seen some things, heard some things, done some things that stay with you. These unforgettable experiences can inform so much of our lives as we recognize life’s true preciousness.
These experiences can be arduous to share, even with our closest loved ones. Folded deep within, like the flags folded into tight triangles that animate so many homes.
Like our widow in the Gospel, we can give sacrificially, we can put in what we have to offer without comparisons, and it is enough.
Veteran or not, your experiences and memories and traumas and burdens and hopes and joys are all welcome here (in the Church).
But wait. No. It is not just welcome. Welcome betokens that there is a list of who is welcome and who is not. Welcome is not the right word. The word we are looking for is belonging.
Your experiences and memories and traumas and burdens and hopes and joys belong here. This is what we are here for. To honor and thank God—for all He had done, for all He has carried us through, to bring our needful hearts and minds and lay them at the feet of Christ in a joyful, grateful sadness.
We honor and thank you!
Since Memorial Day, we have been asking in our bulletins and announcements to let us know if you are a veteran or active duty in any branch of service. We did this so we’d know and perhaps serve you better. There is a lovely group of women who call themselves the “IC Bees” who gather together and make quilts and other crafts. They had the idea of handmaking quilts for each of our veterans, custom for each of them. For months they have worked in preparing these quilts, and we’d like to present one to each of our dear veterans.
Father, bless our veterans and all who serve defending our nation.
For those who bravely gave their lives, grant them eternal rest.
For those who are serving, give them courage.
For those who served, we offer our gratitude.
And we bless them in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit!
We ask this through Christ Our Lord. Amen.
Father Charlie Donahue, CSP, is the pastor of Immaculate Conception Parish in Knoxville. This is the homily he delivered on Sunday, Nov. 10, to mark Veterans Day, which was Nov. 11.
